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Saturday, January 4, 2014


By Trace A. DeMeyer

I was asked recently how many domestic adoptions take place in America each year. I did some research and was surprised to see how much the numbers are shrinking, which means the Nightlight Adoption Agency who handled the Baby Veronica transaction must be very nervous and scouring poor communities like Indian reservations to snatch more infants to sell to people like the Capobiancos (shown at right).
Yes, I am cynical these days. The agencies are going to push to keep their profit margins somehow. They are going to charge more and more to keep their doors open and pay desperate mothers well to relinquish.


Infant Domestic Adoption: A Gradual Slowdown

Every five years, NCFA hires a researcher to survey state administrators in order to determine the total number of infant domestic adoptions in the U.S. As reported in Adoption Factbook V, there were 18,078 infant domestic adoptions in 2007, down from 22,291 in 2002, the last year in which the survey was conducted. The first NCFA survey (1982) identified 17,602 infant domestic adoptions. Since the peak year of 1992, when 26,672 adoptions were identified, the number of private domestic adoptions has dropped each year.
One of the reasons for the decreasing number of domestic adoptions may be a parallel decrease in the percentage of unmarried women relinquishing children for adoption. According to data from the National Survey of Family Growth, relinquishments have declined from nearly nine percent in the 1970s to under one percent of births to never-married women by 1995 (the last available data year). Reasons offered by researchers include an increased social acceptance of single motherhood, and a higher number of unmarried mothers in their 20s rather than their teens.

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  1. Oh, geez, Trace, I wasn't up for seeing a picture of the Crapo--be-awfuls this early in the morning. Ronnie doesn't look too bad in that picture, but she probably doesn't realize yet that she's not going back to her REAL family. It's in the later pic where she's sitting on Mel's lap that she looks stunned and shell-shocked. Funny how the Crapos were such media hounds with Veronica's image everywhere when they were trying to steal her. And now with so many of us worried about her, they have decided to go private. I really wonder what Ronnie looks like now.

  2. I know, pretty shitty of me, but I needed to remind everyone this is reality for an innocent little girl. I can only guess how sad she is - our little Veronica. Yup, Robin, the Capos went silent because they know what they did is actually criminal but they got away with it.
    Reality will prevail.
    Veronica is so torn right now. She is emotionally split living into two worlds.
    Keep good thoughts for her. Pray for her. She needs all the strength we can give her to survive this.

  3. Will do, Trace. I will do everything I can to keep her story alive. I want her to know that we have not, and never will, ever, forget what happened to her.

  4. HOW CAN US MOTHERS SPREAD OUR VOICES ? I WANT TO GRAB ANY SPAM ADS GOVERNMENT WISE ADVERTISING FOR WOMENS EQUAL PAY FOR INSTANCE AND JUST EMAIL THEM MY COMMENT ABOUT WHAT THE WORLD NEEDS QUICKER FOR THE CRITICALLY WOUNDED ADOPTEES SEARCHING FOR THEIR PARENTS AND THE NEWS ABOUT THE CHILD BABY THAT WAS TAKEN FROM HER PARENTS SO QUICK IT WAS ... 'WE GOT CHA !! The adoption industry is out of control to taking the innocent.,and woman for childrens worldwide shots for diseases.I wrote this lady that is in the white house or is a member close to the white house,sorry my memory slips.I'll know it maybe tonight.I still don't know ,except I love causes .Do you have a page created on causes? I wish you did as I just know you would go over the top with so many that would sign a petition for baby Veronica,maybe their was already one ,can't remember.We need another as he has to go back to court and you have the words for us to help ,it's just who and where,sorry about my keys ,pc acted up again? Will get it fixed before I start copying my unpublished many stories about suspense,drama,adventure ,thrillers ,children and non fiction adoption stories of my own story.


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Good Words

Mila @yoonsblur: What can non-adopted people do to help adoptees feel respected in our spaces? Remember that they are guests. Remember that they are visitors. Remember that they will NEVER know what it's like to live an adopted life. Remember that they are visiting our home, our land, our territory. And hence, they need to act and behave accordingly. I like to use the analogy of a heart transplant patient. A heart transplant patient is the only one who knows what it is like to undergo transplantation. They are the only ones who know how it feels to be a transplant patient. The doctors, nurses, family members, etc. do not know what it is like to live life as a transplant patient and none of them would insist that they know what it feels like. They can help take care of the patient, they may even have valuable knowledge that may be applicable, but they still have no clue what it's like to live life as a transplant patient. Even the doctors and nurses can only help if they listen to the patient. Assumptions are dangerous and could even lead to death. Hence, knowledge is never equivalent to experience. A White person who has a Ph.D in African American studies will never know what it's like to live life as an African American. That Ph.D does not make the White person an "expert" on being African American. Similarly, unless you are an adoptee--no matter how many books you've read, no matter how many adopted children you've raised--you will NEVER know what it's like to be an adoptee. So, respect that. Sit down. Listen. Acknowledge. Validate. Do not presume. Do not dismiss. Do not negate. Do not pit adoptees against each other by saying, "Well, I know this one adoptee who..." Turn your mouth off and your ears on. That's what non-adopted folks can do if they truly want to understand and respect adoptees in our spaces.
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